Accepting Help Doesn’t Take Away Your Independence
When did being dependent become such a no-no? In today’s world women, are constantly bombarded with the notion that being dependent is a bad thing. And with the examples displayed in weekly reality shows, of women using their looks for material gratification, it makes sense.
But what if you need help? What if the people in your life understand your vision and want to help you achieve it? Do you pass on the offer because you think you have to do it on your own? There is nothing wrong with receiving help from a significant other, family, or friends. Many women strive to be different than what we are portrayed as on TV, but in doing so, we sometimes close a helpful door, a door that could help us, reach the next level.
I also struggled with this a few years ago. Before moving to NYC from California, I quit my job and moved back home for a few months. It was the first time I’d lived with my parent since graduating from high school; that alone was a huge adjustment. I also had to adjust to not having a paycheck every two weeks.
Prior to quitting my job, I’d saved money in preparation for my cross country move. While staying with my parents, my mom told me not to worry about my finances because her and my father were going to take care of them. They wanted me to have all the money I’d saved to be used only when I finally got to NYC. Most people would look at this situation as something good. Like, who doesn't want to be taken care of? But for some women (me) when you're so used to doing things for yourself, it's really hard to let someone help.
It was such a struggle for me to give in and let my parents "take care of me." I was so used to having my own money and doing my own thing for years that having someone give me money made me feel like a charity case. I later realized my parents were sacrificing to help me achieve my dreams and help me stay out of financial debt.
It was such a struggle for me to give in and let my parents "take care of me." I was so used to having my own money and doing my own thing for years that having someone give me money made me feel like a charity case.
The point, I am trying to make here, is not about my parents being in the position to help me financially. It’s about taking a step back and understanding that receiving help is not a bad thing. Yes, push yourself to the limit and beyond. But there has to be a balance. Accepting help doesn’t discredit or take away from what you are doing or what you’ve already accomplished. Allow those who love and support your dream to help you achieve it. Don’t be so independent that you close the door on a helping hand.
image via CreateHER Stock